We'll Find Our Way to You
by Akiko Natsuko
Summary: Sometimes you need to be alone to grieve. Other times, you need to have those you love around you to remind you of what you have. (Erza/Mira/Lucy)


Lucy sighed as she crossed out the last two sentences she had written, grimacing as she realised that the last couple of pages were nothing more than crossed out words and smudges, setting aside her pen as she let her head fall back against the cushioned back of the booth. She couldn't focus, not today, and it was grating on her nerves because all she wanted to do was write and forget about what day it was, and distract herself from the memories that were just a little too close to the surface today. She was just about to try again, hoping that sheer stubbornness would make the words flew when she heard familiar voices heading in her direction, and despite her mood, she found herself smiling as she realised that Mira and Erza were bickering between themselves.

It amused her to realise that anyone who didn't know the pair would have thought that they were genuinely arguing as their voices became gradually more strident, insults seeping into the exchange. However, she could hear the fondness beneath the words, and when she glanced up, it was just in time to catch their matching smiles, the gentle brush of a hand against an elbow, and the twinkle of mischief in Mira's eyes and she shook her head.

"What are you two bickering about now?" She asked, as soon as they were in range, gratefully accepting the mug that Mira set in front of her and cradling it between her hands as they settled on either side of her.

"I told Erza that we should make the most of having my place to ourselves before Lisanna and Elfman come home tomorrow, but…"

"It's supposed to be my turn tonight," Erza cut her off with a frown, but Lucy caught the glint in her eyes, and knew that she didn't really mind where they spent the night. She just wanted a chance to challenge Mira, something that had never disappeared, despite the change in their relationship and she bit her lip to hide her smile, hastily taking a sip of her drink when Mira glanced at her. "Of course, we could always settle this the traditional way?" Erza suggested casually, fooling neither of them and Lucy snorted into her mug, noting that Mira's eyes had lit up at the prospect of a challenge, and wondering just what she'd done to deserve girlfriends like this.

It took her a moment to realise that they were both looking at her now, and just like that, she felt her spirits take a dive under their expectant gazes. Normally, she was more than happy to let them drag her into whatever competition they contrived to try and get their own way, but today it felt like it was too much, and slowly she set her drink down.

"If it's okay with you two I'll sit this one out," she murmured, carefully not looking at them. Although that meant looking down, unable to avoid glancing at the scribbled mess in her notebook, her spirits sinking further although she was quick to seize on it as an excuse. "I'm going to go home and write for a bit."

"Lucy?"

"I'm fine," Lucy made herself look up, meeting worried blue eyes. She tried for a reassuring smile, although she had a feeling that it was anything but as Mira shared an unreadable glance with Erza, and she bit her lip. Part of her knew that she just tell them what was bothering her, but they had been in such high spirits all day, enjoying the rare time off from work and the peace that had settled over the guild, and she didn't have the heart to bother her. It was only one day, after all, tomorrow she would be back to normal, and it wasn't as though they didn't spend the odd night apart anyway, although it had been a while, and her voice was steadier as she added quietly. "I just need some time to myself."

"Are you sure?" Erza asked, reaching for her hand and tangling their fingers together and for a moment the Celestial mage was distracted as she always was by how the woman who could strike fear into the hearts of some of the most powerful mages, could be so gentle. Then she smiled, more genuinely this time as she squeezed Erza's fingers.

"I'm sure," she lifted Erza's hand to her mouth, pressing a kiss to her fingers, and smiling as Mira immediately grabbed her other hand and did the same. "Seriously, I'm all right you two, and it's only one night, so you shouldn't manage to kill each other," she teased. Managing to laugh when they pulled a face at each other, before gently beginning to extract herself, missing the meaningful look they shared and the way Erza's expression darkened as she glimpsed the scribbled out words just before Lucy closed her book. "I'll see you both in the morning, try not to get Natsu involved in whatever madness your planning." They had only just finished paying off the damages from that little mishap, and she was enjoying having some spare jewels for once, although she wasn't reassured when they both glanced across at the Dragon-slayer who was watching Romeo show off a new flame he had been working on. "Behave."

"Never," Mira retorted.

"Always," Erza rose to let her out of the booth, but not before pulling Lucy into a lingering kiss. "If you need us…"

"I know where to find you," Lucy finished, smiling into the kiss, before pulling back and pressing one to the tip of the redhead's nose. Only to find herself being spun around as Mira, leant in to steal a kiss of her own. She didn't say anything, but the fact that the kiss remained deliberately soft, and the way her fingers were buried into Lucy's shirt, pulling her close, was enough to tell Lucy that she was concerned too. "I'll see you both in the morning," she said, eventually untangling herself, feeling a pang of loneliness as she slipped out of their hold, and she headed for the door with a wave before she changed her mind.

Behind her Erza and Mira had moved closer to each other, the latter wrapping an arm around the red-head, and pulling her closer with a sigh.

"You know where we're staying tonight?"

"Of course."

She hadn't been any more productive at home, and she found herself spending a couple of hours curled up in her armchair, rereading some of the letters that her father had written to her in the seven years she'd been lost. The words had long since been ingrained in her heart and memory, but there was something about reading them again, today of all days, that had her heart aching, tears prickling in the corner of her eyes. It made her more aware of all the things that he had missed out on. He didn't know that she had come back, or how much her magic had grown. He'd never had a chance to meet Mira and Erza, and see how much the pair had come to mean to her…

_I miss him…_

Eventually, she had forced herself to move, eyes sore and aching as she carefully stashed the letters back in her keepsake box and hiding back under her bed. Startled to realise that it was already dark outside, she was tempted to bypass dinner, her stomach tying itself in knots at the thought of food, but Mira always seemed to know when she didn't eat, and then they would both be chasing her for the next few days. Which wasn't so bad when it involved Erza, as it was about the only time that the redhead would willingly share her precious cake, but Mira could have a mothering streak a mile wide at times. So dutifully, she went through and heated up some soup, noting that she would need to go food shopping again soon, still not used to buying for three… although maybe she should be, because Natsu ate for more than that, and she had fed him for long enough.

That brought a smile to her face at last, and she scrubbed the last traces of tears from her cheeks before she ate, for the first time feeling the fact that she was on her own. Mealtimes were never dull when the other two were around, whether it was just sharing old tales of the guild from before she had arrived, talking about their days or jobs they were thinking of taking, to stealing bites from each others' plates and trying to feed her. It dawned on her that at some point she had forgotten what it was like to eat alone and in silence, and for a moment she was swept into a different time and place, sitting at the end of the table and staring at her father's empty seat.

However, this was different. All she had to do here was blink and look around, and she could evidence of Erza and Mira's presence in her life. It was there in the dishes piled in the sink from breakfast with the three of them, to the pile of armour cleaning supplies stashed in the corner of the kitchen, and Mira's favourite pyjamas hanging on the clothes stand. And in the fact that if she wanted, she could go and find them and know that she would be welcomed with open arms, and it was that which allowed her to push the memories away and finish her dinner.

It wasn't so easy to convince herself when she stepped into her bedroom that once upon a time had never felt big enough when Natsu and Happy had crept through her window to crash for the night, but now felt cavernous as she stared at the bed. It had been a long time since she'd slept alone she realised with a pang, arms creeping around herself in a self-hug. _I'm alone._ She'd thought that being on her own, and in her own place would make today a little easier, or at least stop the other two from sharing in her misery. Well, she supposed that she'd succeeded in some ways because they weren't here, and not having them here was distracting her from her memories. However, she hadn't expected the strange ache that came from looking at their bed, at the rumpled covers from where their early morning cuddles had somehow descended into a tickle fight after Mira had accidentally poked Erza in one of the few spots that could reduce her to giggles.

"It's just until tomorrow," she told herself sternly. However, the words seemed lost in the silence, and with a grimace she began to get ready for bed, having a feeling that it was going to be a long night no matter how she looked at it. As she got ready for bed, she tried to distract herself with plans for the next day, remembering that they'd been talking about trying to take a job near the seaside so that they could combine it with a holiday, determined to replace Erza's last experience at the beach with better memories. The only problem was that there was no one to bounce ideas off or to pull faces at her, when she talked about books and trying to find new ones, and no one to remind her that they were meant to be working too.

Eventually, she gave up and slipped into bed, not realising that she had managed to steal their clothes until she was under the covers. Not that she had any intention of changing, her fingers slipping over the fluffy bottoms that Erza would live in if she could get away with it, and burying her nose in Mira's favourite baggy t-shirt that she had stolen from her brother years ago, and now smelled of her girlfriend. She remained like that as she closed her eyes, trying to will herself to relax and fall asleep, and trying not to focus on how small and lonely she felt lying in the middle of the bed that normally barely fit the three of them.

Ten minutes later she was lying there, eyes open as she stared at the ceiling, mentally counting stars and reconstructing the constellations, arms outstretched in an attempt to make the bed feel a little less small.

_It's going to be a long night…_

She must've fallen asleep at some point, although she knew that it had been gone midnight when last she'd checked the clock, and as she drifted towards awareness, she couldn't hold back a yawn. It felt like she had barely slept, and she was about to roll over and try and go back to sleep, not caring what time it was when she froze as she realised that she was no longer alone in the bed. There was a warmth against her back, someone curled around her, with a mirrored warmth at her front and a sleepy smile tugged at her lips, even as she opened her eyes to confirm what she already knew. There was just enough light coming through her window to let her see the white hair in front of her, and tilting her head, she found Erza smiling at her.

"I didn't think my place was in the running…" Lucy whispered, fingers moving to brush through Mira's hair, petting it softly, and somehow, she was unsurprised when the other girl moved, rolling over to face her and capturing her hand in the process, pressing a lip to each tip.

"Your place won the moment you told us you wanted to be alone," Erza was the one to reply, the sleepiness in her voice indicating that she had been close to dropping off, and Lucy wondered how long they had been there and how they had slipped in without waking her. Not that it mattered, their warmth, Mira's lips against her fingers and the fingers now running over her back, easy away the last pangs of loneliness and she sighed, leaning into the attention.

"I'm sorry."

"No," Mira scolded, abandoning her fingers in favour of lightly kissing her on the lips. "We're sorry, we didn't realise what day it was." _Oh…_

"But…I should have told you," Lucy admitted, trying to glance away, but neither of them was having any of it as they pulled her down between them, moving onto their sides and propping themselves up so that she could see them both.

"Yes, you should have." That was Erza, but the sternness that would have once made Lucy squeak and run a mile was tempered with fondness and concern, and her fingers were gentle as she cupped Lucy's cheek, tracing the path that the Celestial mage's tears had taken earlier even though the evidence was long gone. "But we should have remembered too." Lips replaced the fingers, as Erza pressed light kisses to her cheek and nose, stealing one last kiss on the lips before she pulled back and asked softly. "Are you all right?"

"I miss him," Lucy said softly, knowing that if they had asked earlier, she wouldn't have been as ready to admit it aloud, even though they both knew how much she missed her father. However, here, with both of them pressing against her, their hands meeting hers halfway as she reached out, tangling their fingers together, the words came easier. "And I miss all the things that he missed out on, all the things he will never know…like the two of you." She knew that her grip must be bordering on painful now, but neither of them protested. "But…I missed you more." The words crept out, as though she wasn't sure that she should be saying them, but as soon as she said them, she realised that it was true.

It wasn't that she didn't miss her father. She always would, regardless of how their relationship had been for most of her life, and she would always regret that he hadn't lived to see her return, to see the life she had now… the family she was making for herself. But that was the thing, she had a family now. Not just Fairy Tail, but Mira and Erza, the three of them in this strange, wonderful balance they had created for themselves.

They were her future. Her home. Her family.

"I missed you," she repeated, voice still soft, but steadier. Almost reverent, and she tugged at their linked hands, trying to pull them closer, but that was unnecessary as she found herself bracketed on both sides as Mira and Erza wrapped themselves around her.

"We're here," Mira was the first to speak, squeezing her fingers lightly where their hands were trapped between them now, kissing the corner of her mouth before letting her head come to rest against Lucy's shoulder. "We'll always be here, as long as you want us." Erza hummed her agreement, her free arm creeping across Lucy to wrap around them both, pulling them closer, as she leant in for own kiss.

"Mira's right," she murmured, managing to sound sulky enough to startle a watery laugh out of Lucy, mirroring Mira as she settled against the Celestial mage's other shoulder. "In the morning, we'll go to see him. All three of us." Lucy knew that she was trembling now, eyes stinging, and both Mira and Erza hugged her tighter. "He will still know about us, Lucy and about everything else you've done since that time." Lucy sniffled and nodded, trying to blink back the tears, but the other two were having none of it as they surrounded her with their warmth, murmuring reassurances, and she buried herself against them as the tears came.

It was different this time as she cried herself out because she wasn't alone…and not all the tears were sad, because there was relief that she was no longer alone and happiness amongst the grief, at the realisation that she could share this life, this future with her father. And as she curled against them, the tears slowly coming to an end, she found herself smiling as she let eyes drift shut.

_Papa, I can't wait for you to meet them…_


End file.
